


To The Heart, Through The Stomach

by JustAndrea



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Date Night, Fluff, Hater is still working on being a good BF, M/M, Sickness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 06:01:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8566705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAndrea/pseuds/JustAndrea
Summary: Hater’s cooking skills have always been… pretty lacking (and that’s putting it politely). But he’s never been one to back down from a challenge, and especially when it involves his boyfriend! And it’s just cooking, it should be fine, right? Great, even! …Then again, how often do things tend to go exactly to plan?





	

“Some of this… A bit of salt…” Hater glanced down at the cookbook page and picked up a spoon. “Hmm, maybe some more stirring too. Food needs to be well stirred, right? …Yeah, that sounds about right.” So, he stuck his tongue out slightly as he stirred the pot, staring down at the bubbly, chunky substance with in. “Hmmm… Bubbling should mean it’s just about done, so now I just-”

“Sir?” The skeletal lord quickly turned around to face his commander. “The dining room is set and ready for a meal for two,” Peepers announced, holding back a grimace.

Hater actually smiled a bit at that. “Good! And you got the flowers too, right?”

“Yes,” Peepers nodded, slightly slightly, “And I made sure they were colorful, just like you asked.”

“Great!” Hater shouted, his smile now a full-blown grin before becoming a smirk, “Hmph, I told you this date was going to go perfectly, didn’t I, Peepers?”

“Yes yes, Sir, of co-” Peepers stopped. His senses were finally picking up on the smells within the kitchen, and once he smelt (and heard, based on how much the concoction was bubbling) just what his lord was cooking, well… “Erm, you know, Sir, a great ruler such as yourself shouldn’t have to waste their time on such a minor task as this! So, why don’t you just wait for your date in the dining room, and I’ll-”

Hater groaned, scowling at him now. “Peepers, I already told you, _I’m_ cooking this! So just stop asking, alright?!”

Another sigh. Well, at least he wouldn’t be blamed if things went wrong. “Yes Sir.”

“Good! Now get out, I have to finish this!” Peepers obeyed, and Hater turned his concentration back to his dish, silently wondering whether or not he should add another onion or two.

Honestly, it would’ve been easier just to let Peepers or one of the Watchdog chefs cook their meal - and Hater even silently acknowledged the fact that part of him did want to take the easy way out. But, above that lazy desire was a simple fact: Lord Hater was no quitter, especially not when it came to stuff that involved his wandering weirdo of a boyfriend.

‘Besides, I do kinda owe him,’ he thought to himself, remembering all the delicious meals Wander had made for him - both during their dating period and long before. Breakfasts, desserts, picnic lunches, filling meals, and even a few recipes from other galaxies! All delicious and, of course, made with love.

So, now it was Hater’s turn. That was what good boyfriends did, after all, they cook a great dinner for their dates! Plus, the idea of Wander smiling at and genuinely enjoying something Hater made for him did sound pretty nice. And sure, he didn’t have much experience in cooking but- “But I’m great at lots of stuff! And I even mostly followed the recipe this time! So why wouldn’t it be great?!”

With that in mind, Hater put down his spoon and placed a lid on the pot, giving a confident nod. This date was going to be perfect, he was sure of it!

Once he was done cooking their supper, Hater had just enough time to quickly shower and change into a clean cloak before racing to the dining room. Just as Peepers had promised, everything looked to be in order and all of the table flowers were colorful - and not a moment too soon. He could faintly hear his date’s voice from down the hall, and almost immediately stiffened and started sweating. Gah, stupid butterflies.

Thankfully though, his nerves weren’t enough to keep him from giving a genuine smile when the nomad walked into the room. “Hey Hater!” Wander greeted, hugging him, “Long time no see, hun!”

Hater rolled his eyes slightly. “Wander, it’s only been like two weeks since our last date!” Nevertheless, he returned the hug, enjoying the affection though still trying to hide it a bit in case someone was watching. …It was actually kind of hard to believe that he used to hate these warm, loving hugs of Wander’s. Funny how even the most unlikely of things still manage to change.

Wander giggled. “I know, I know. Still, it’s nice to see ya again!” Looking up at his skeletal date, his smile softened. “I’ve been really lookin’ forward to another date with you. And yeah, I know we’ve had plenty but they still make me excited - not to mention how happy it makes me just bein’ with you~”

Again, Hater felt his tiny heart skip a beat, but his smile never faltered. “Y-Yeah well, I… I like our dates too and stuff so, yeah… Glad you could make it, Wan.”

The nomad grinned, giving his boyfriend one last squeeze before letting go. “Well, thank you for invitin’ me! So, are we ready to get this date started?”

Hater nodded, already leading Wander to the long table. He then pulled out Wander’s seat for him - making sure not to pull it out too much - and pushed it back in once he sat down before rushing over to his own seat. Once they were both seated, Hater snapped his fingers, and within seconds a Watchdog waiter (complete with a little red bow tie clipped to his uniform) came in with drinks and appetizers. Naturally, it was a salad and sparkling apple juice for Wander and fried potato wedges and Thunderblazz for Hater.

The conversation was good, but as the couple ate and talked about what they had been up to since their last phone call, Hater’s nerves started to creep up on him once more. Not too much thankfully, given how much Wander was distracting him, but he could still feel them slightly in the back of his skull.

“Mmm~ One of the best salads I’ve ever had!” Wander grinned, putting his fork down, “So, do you know what the main course is gonna be?”

“Uh, yeah, sorta…” Hater glanced away slightly, clenching his fists. “I, I was the one who cooked it.”

Wander blinked, actually a bit surprised about that. “Really?”

“Yeah! I mean, you cook stuff for me all the time so… I-I just, wanted to cook something for you too…”

“…” Slowly, Wander’s surprise turned into a huge, loving grin. “Awwww, Hateyyyy~!” Had they not been a whole table apart, he would definitely pulled him into another hug. “That was so sweet of you to do! And I’m sure I’ll love it! Nothin’ better than a dish made from the heart, after all!”

“Heh, yeah,” Hater said, smiling a bit now, “…Thanks.”

Wander giggled again. “Heh, I should be thankin’ you for the food, honey badger!” He looked past his boyfriend slightly. “And speakin’ of food-”

The waiter returned to their table - though honestly it was a wonder he could even find his way to it, given how full his arms were and how little he could see past them - and put down two covered dishes. Not wanting to give the Watchdog anymore trouble, Wander lifted the silver cover off his dish himself, and grinned at what had been revealed. “Oooh, we’re havin’ stew? Oh, and it looks like a couple dinner rolls too!”

“Yeah,” Hater nodded as he lifted his own cover (relieved to see that the stew still looked as good as how he left it), “I thought something like this would be good, in case we wanted seconds or thirds or whatever.” That, and stew was one of the easiest things in the Galaxy to make, but still had a bit of class to it and could be eaten as part as a somewhat fancy meal.

“Looks good to me!” Wander replied, already picking up his spoon. And that really was the truth, it did look good. Sure, maybe it was a bit overdone and maybe had a few more chunks in it than your average stew, but it still looked edible and smelt alright, so there was no reason for Wander to suspect it of being bad. So, without any hesitation, he scooped up a spoonful of stew, and took a bite.

Wander chewed, then paused, then chewed some more, then tasted, then paused again… It wasn’t that it tasted bad, far from it in fact. But it didn’t taste great either. It just tasted strange, and pretty unfamiliar. But again, not bad. So, despite his tastebuds still being a bit confused, Wander swallowed and smiled. “Mmm!”

Feeling his own stomach relax, Hater grinned and started eating his own stew, shoveling it in much faster than Wander was. But their eating speed didn’t matter. All that mattered was that Wander liked it.

“So, after supper, what’s next on the date plan, hun?”

Hater thought for a bit as he chewed. “Well, I w’s th'king m'ybe a moobie or-” He swallowed. “Or something. Or maybe we could play a game again. You said you liked that one with the fixing guy and the wrecking guy, right?”

“Oh yeah! That one was pretty fun! But-” He paused, feeling a bit of something in his gut, but only for a moment. “But uh, I wouldn’t mind watchin’ a movie either! But if you’re not in the mood, there’s plenty of other things, like stargazing or takin’ a walk around the ship or-” Wander stopped again, covering his mouth as he let out a small burp. “O-oh, 'scuse me.”

“It’s fine,” Hater said, waving it off, “I guess stargazing doesn’t sound too bad. Hmm… Maybe we could watch a movie outside, and then watch the stars afterwards. And, uh… Maybe some cuddling and making out too?”

Despite the slight churning in his stomach, Wander still chuckled. “Of course!” He smirked slightly. “I wouldn’t leave our date without givin’ you a smooch or two.”

Hater scowled a bit in embarrassment, though he didn’t try to deny the offer. “Gah, whatever. So what kind of movie do you feel like watching?”

“Hmm, maybe-” Wander’s stomach lurched, causing him to cringe a bit. “Uh, w-what movie do YOU feel like watchin’, Hater?”

The skeletal lord shrugged, dipping one of his bread rolls in his stew. “I dunno, I - Oh! Did you hear about that one really cool action movie?! The one with the guy in the red suit and has all the lasers and swords and stuff? It just got released on streaming!” Wander shook his head, trying his hardest to keep the forced smile on his face.

“Well, it’s all about this guy who’s a superhero, but he’s not a super good guy or anything, and he’s really tough and can’t feel pain, and I think he fights a metal guy or something, and-”

As Hater talked and quickly got caught up in the subject, all Wander could do was to just try and at least listen as he wrapped his arms around himself. Grop, maybe the stew didn’t taste too bad, but it sure wasn’t sittin’ right… Maybe he had just eaten too much? Or too quickly? Or, maybe Hater had just added a bit too much spice to it or something? Whatever the reason, Wander tried not to make a big deal out of it, this was a date after all. Unfortunately, the longer he sat there in pained silence, the sicker he felt…

“-and I don’t get why they can’t make all superhero movies look as cool as that one! Or give more movies to the villains. And yeah, I know there was that one but it was just so du-” Hater stopped, noticing how his date wasn’t even looking at him now. He scowled. “Wander, are you even listening?!”

“Huh? Oh, uh, sure! Erg, I just-” Wander flinched, just now noticing their waiter returning to their table.

As he refilled Wander’s glass, sharp-dressed Watchdog couldn’t help but stare at him a bit. “Geez… Oh, uh, sorry. It’s just, you _really_ don’t look so good, guy.”

“Huh?” Hater blinked. Just what did he mean by that? Squinting across the table, Hater looked closely at the nomad, and felt a pinch of concern when he noticed that his normally bright orange fur had paled a bit, not to mention the slight shaking or just how tightly he was holding his mid-section. “Wan…?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” Wander insisted, the forced smile only half there now, “But uh, j-just for curiousity’s sake, could ya- erg, c-could ya tell me what was in that stew?”

“It, it was just a normal stew!” Hater insisted, shrugging slightly, “I followed the recipe and everything!”

“Ugh, well, what _ingredients_ did the recipe call for?” “Uhh-” Hater started counting them off on his fingers, “Water, sauce, potatoes, broccoli, salt, beef, onio-”

Wander’s eyes widened, his fur getting even paler. “Uh… D-Did you say beef?”

“Yeah! Ground beef!” Hater answered without worry, “Though, beef’s alright but it isn’t as great as some other meats out there. So I added some bacon bits in there too for flavoring and stuff! …Do you think that messed it up or something?”

By this point, it felt like Wander’s stomach was doing cartwheels. “Well, erm, not 'messed up’, but- b-but-!”

“But what?!” Hater asked, his worry growing. Unfortunately, his boyfriend never gave him an answer. Instead, Wander just slapped a hand over his mouth and stood up, knocking over his chair as he ran out of the room. And, just as Hater was about to run after him, the answer suddenly hit him like an asteroid to the face.

“…Oh. Right. The whole vegetarian thing…”

“Geez,” the waiter mumbled, shaking his head a bit, “…So, I guess that means no dessert? Or- EEP!” Dropping his pitcher of juice, the Watchdog just barely managed to dodge the lightning bolt that was shot at him and run back out into the hallway.

Luckily for him, Hater wasn’t in the mood to try and hit him again. Instead, he just let his forehead hit the table as he groaned. “So much for perfect…”

()()()()()()()()()()

“Ughhhhhh…” Swallowing (and grimacing at the taste now in his throat), Wander picked his hat up off the bathroom floor and reached into it, pulling out a handkerchief. Once he finished wiping his mouth off, he gently put his hat back down and gripped the toilet once more. It felt like he was done, but he wanted to stay near it just in case. Besides, finished or not, he didn’t exactly feel up to getting off of the floor anytime soon…

A small knock (despite the door already being open) made him look up. “Uh… Hey,” Hater said quietly, his arms behind his back and his eyes more focused on the tiles below his feet than his boyfriend.

Despite this, Wander gave a small smile. “Heyyyy…” When Hater didn’t reply, he added, “You can come in if you want.”

Hater did so, and once he was sitting, he revealed just what was behind his back. “Peepers said that dry toast was supposed to help with upset stomachs,” he told Wander as he gently handed him the plate, “And, he’s the one who made it so, so you don’t have to worry about it being poisoned or anything…”

“Awww, you didn’t poison me!” Wander insisted, taking the plate.

But Hater just continued to glare at the floor. “Hmph, I still made you throw up!” he argued.

“Honey badger, it was just an accident!”

“No, it was me being stupid!” the skeletal lord insisted, finally looking at Wander now, “I mean, what kind of boyfriend totally forgets that their boyfriend is a vegetarian and makes them something full of meat?!”

But Wander just continued smiling at him. “The kind that has good intentions and just made a mistake.”

“…Hmph.” Hater crossed his arms and looked away. “…Do you ever think that you’re _too_ forgiving?”

“Nope,” his date answered simply before picking up one of the pieces of toast. With nothing else to really say, the couple just sat there, Hater in silence and Wander taking tiny bites of his second meal of the evening, chewing quietly. However, the near-silence didn’t last for too long.

“…I’m sorry,” Hater said finally, sighing slightly as he did so.

“I forgive you,” Wander told him, despite never being upset with him in the first place, “And you know, I did enjoy spendin’ time with you tonight. Talkin’, getting to see you again, bein’ together with you and knowin’ that you’re enjoying it too… All of that was just perfect to me.”

“…If, if you say so,” Hater said, unable to help but smile, just a little. “So, uh-” He rubbed the back of his head, “Do you think we could uh… You know, kiss now or some-?” He stopped, seeing Wander’s smile quickly fall at the suggestion. His horns folded down in disappointment, but he didn’t try to argue.

Once Wander saw this however, he quickly explained. “It’s not that I don’t want to, you know I love kissing you! But, well, after what I just did, it probably wouldn’t be the best kissin’ experience for either of us, you know?”

Hater’s eyes widened a bit in realization. “Ohhhh. Ugh, right, good point. …But, after you brush your teeth, then-?”

“Definitely~” Wander smiled, giving him a firm nod.

“Okay,” Hater smiled back. As his body relaxed a bit, he felt something brush up against his ribcage and suddenly remembered his back-up plan in case Wander had been really mad at him. “Wait, hold on-” He reached into his cloak pocket. “I don’t know if it’ll make you feel better or not but, I know that it’s your favorite, so-”

Wander gasped, sitting up straight as he stared at the big, red, juicy apple. “…Awwww, you remembered!” he squee’d, putting his plate up onto the edge of the bathroom sink before rushing forward and hugging his skeletal boyfriend.

“Well yeah, of course I did! Why wouldn’t I-?” Hater paused, quickly realizing the irony of that sentence. “Er, I mean, I didn’t remember the vegetarian thing but I can still remember stuff about you! …But, n-not just stuff that I learned about by messing with you, 'cause-!”

Wander just chuckled, silencing him with a quick, light kiss to the cheek. “Thank you, Hater.”

“…You’re welcome.” With that settled, Wander’s grip loosened a bit and he ended up sliding right into his boyfriend’s lap.

“Mmm, that apple does look pretty good… I’m really lookin’ forward to eating it later, but for now… do you wanna just keep keepin’ me company?”

“…I guess,” Hater said, his one hand already gently petting Wander’s back while the other put the apple back in his pocket.

Wander hummed happily at that, nuzzling up against his lover’s boney chest. “Alrighty then, it’s a date…” His stomach still felt a bit upset, but he didn’t let it bother him too much now. After all, was there any ailment that a bit of cuddling couldn’t cure?

Hater nodded and continued petting his boyfriend, a light smile still on his own face as he felt both happy and grateful to still have Wander even want to be with him after their supper gone wrong. …But, he could admit easily that the first half hadn’t been too bad, and maybe sitting on the bathroom floor next to a toilet wasn’t the most romantic setting ever, but they still had each other - they still had warm hugs and loving words and plenty of smooches to look forward to later.

So, maybe by some miracle, their date had been pretty great after all. Not perfect, but still… pretty darn great.


End file.
